Marti's Theories

Thursday, August 31, 2006

What Does It Mean To Be a Romantic?


Every now and then I hear or read something that I first take for granted, but then stop and ask myself:

WTF does that mean, anyway?

Well, I don't actually use acronyms inside my own head but I think you get the idea.

Such was the case yesterday. I was half listening to an interview or something and heard the interviewee say, "Yes, I think so! But then again, I'm a romantic." To be honest, I am not even sure what they were talking about. Anyway, this comment was followed by a little chuckle shared by him and the interviewer, in the way that people do when they think they both get it.

I went about my business.

About an hour later, driving to work, the interview snippet flashed into my head. And I realized - I don't really know what people mean when they say they are a romantic.

I think it's one of those expressions that we ASSUME has a common meaning, but might actually vary greatly, from one person's perspective to another. And it's said here, often, and not always in the context of romance, per se.

So I'm wondering...

Do you consider yourself a romantic?

And if so (or if not) WTF does it mean to you?

I'm not looking for the Webster's definition. I'm just wondering what that term means to you.



Painting: Idealist by Smadar Livne

Friday, August 25, 2006

Just Call Me Sybil


All right, let's review:

I've been blogging on another website for over a year now. I love the folks that are there, but am looking for something more mainstream.

In the quest for this, I now have various degrees of Blog-in-Process on four (count em) four different sites.

And at the moment, I don't really have time to devote to developing a cohesive thought on any of em.

Why?

Gliding right past the lack of cohesion in my thought process in general, I will blame it on what I consider my annual Hell Week.

I am the sole staff for a college outreach facility in a very rural area and this is the first week of Fall Semester. During this week more than any other, I morph into someone from the I Love Lucy episode where the old couple quite literally wear all the hats in their small town - Police officer, Jailer, Attorney, Judge, Gas station attendant, Cook, you get the picture. Anyway, this week I am Counselor, Registrar, Cashier, Clerk, Coordinator, Site Manager, Technician, Spring 07 planner, etc etc etc. Whew...I'm exhausted just writing it.

In addition to all that, I am also on a mayor-appointed committee that sponsors a huge Women's Health Fair that falls on the last Saturday in August. So I've also spent the week dealing with that.

Why am I telling you all this?

I have no idea.

In other news...

Using soy milk in coffee takes a great deal of effort and practice.

Know how slightly curdled milk looks in coffee (altogether now: "Ewwwww") Anyway, soy milk SOMETIMES does that, although it does NOT mean it's spoiled. And I finally figured out why--

If the coffee is too hot, it basically cooks the soy.

Whaddya think of that?

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Technorati Claim

Friday, August 04, 2006

When Obstacles Are Just Too Big



We can’t find the remote.

What that means is that, if my kid wanders away without turning off the TV, then whatever program comes up next wafts its way into my left ear while I work on my computer. Yes, I could actually get up, walk over and turn off the TV. Often I do, but sometimes it simply doesn’t occur to me. Then I end up with all of this data that entered my subconscious, almost subliminally.

Last night was one of those times.

The program following whatever a 13 year old boy would watch was a brief documentary on the Duke of Windsor and Wallis Simpson. You know, the guy who abdicated the British Throne in order to marry the woman that he loved, an American divorcee? Anyway, as is the case with semi-subliminal crap, I didn’t really pay attention at the time, but woke up thinking about it. Two things struck me:

1. How ridiculous it is for that to have been such a big deal and how much times have changed for the monarchy. Yeah, huh?

2. (And this is the point. Finally) What, exactly, would you give up for the person that you love?

Now don’t go all Starry-Eyed Idealist on me. I mean, really, be PRACTICAL with this.
Whether we like it or, outside circumstance DO affect relationships. And sometimes, they are simply too great for the relationship to survive. Running with the pop culture thing for a bit here…

Circumstances can be negative (think Brokeback Mountain and I promise I’ll never mention that movie again) or for the greater good (think Casablanca). Both are valid and a part of reality.

So this is what I think, in the form of an equation.

IF:

(Person 1's Love) + (Person 2's Love) > (Obstacles) + (Outside opinion)

THEN you have a decent chance of making it.

And like it or not, outside opposition, though not as intense as in previous generations, is alive and well. Regardless of how we feel, the opinions of friends, family, community, government, etc DO affect a relationship.

Some of the areas I can think of off the top of my head are when the two people are different in –
religion, race, political beliefs, age, generation, national origin, handicap, physical appearance or size, economic background, social standing, same gender, opinion of family, and so many more.

What I’m wondering is…

Have you ever had to deal with my equation, on a large scale? Where do you draw the line? Are there specific issues where you know you would reluctantly have to step away from (possibly) the love of your life, for these or other reasons? Don’t worry too much about being politically correct – if you are respectful and your heart is in the right place, you can answer honestly. PC comments will probably be kinda boring, anyway.

The older I get, the more of a “screw ’em” attitude I am acquiring. But to be honest, this has come about more recently that I’d like to admit. Heck it was only a few years ago that I had enough confidence to date a man shorter than me! And now, I think – what a ridiculous standard. There have been more smashed standards since then, but that's a whole other post. I digress.

I think for me the key would be having faith in the LEFT SIDE of the equation. Traditionally, I’ve had a difficult time believing the other person is as “into” a relationship as I am. But when and if I can accept that, I’m pretty sure, with the exception of how it will affect my minor son, I would grit my teeth and fight those battles.

I don’t know. It’s just theory.

btw...
Does anyone have an extra remote?